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Holinger: Fall leads to hobbled dog, reflections on life

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The weekend before Thanksgiving, my wife, Tia, left for France to visit our daughter studying in Paris, so I gave Saturday the attention a pirate gives his map – which movies to see, which writing to finish, which Fresh Market pre-cooked feasts to savor.

Dawn evolved cold and bright. Lucky, our Bichon-Cockapoo mix, scratched on the back door. Noticing the slick deck, I remembered Tia warning me all fall, “Don’t go out back when it’s slippery; you might fall.”

Ha! Slippage happened on Slip-n-Slides, not on stairs navigated by mature husbands left in charge of the family pet.

The fuzzy football clutched under an arm, above the first stair I grabbed the railing and started down, cooing, “Little bit icy here, but –”

My feet flew out from under me. Instinctively, I reached back to break my fall, and Lucky was airborne. Hands, legs and paws swirled like a conductor’s baton accompanied by a symphony of screams and yelps. We thudded onto the stairs, where I lay beached as the misnomered dog cascaded onto the lawn.

As long as I could move, my health didn’t matter. Tia would only kill me if the dog got hurt. When no vital parts argued against it, I scrambled over to him.

“It’s gonna be OK,” I said, pretty sure it wasn’t.

Upright, he dragged one hind leg like a plow. Later, the vet’s X-rays discovered a dislocated bone. Multiple calls to Tia, strolling down the Christmas-lit Champs-Elysees, ended in a decision to forgo major surgery, opting to have the dislodged bone popped back in place.

This meant confinement, along with hobbling his two hind legs with a white three-inch bandage to prevent splaying. I cordoned off the family room Les Miz-style, my barricade a folding chaise lounge, baby fence and assorted pillows. Behind it, Un-Lucky glared at me when not sleeping off the morphine patch.

As for my take-away from the fall, one forearm looked like a musket ball lodged therein, but nothing serious. Tia assured me she’d have been sadder if something serious had happened to me instead of Lucky, but that’s a stretch; at best, I’m on par with the dog.

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